Looking Inside to Find Your Way Out

“You can have your own opinions, but you can’t have your own facts.”-Comedian Ricky Gervais

I’ve never really believed much of anything that I read or hear, so you can only imagine where I stand here in 2020. It’s one thing to be an informed citizen, another to be an over-informed citizen, and entirely another to be a falsely- informed citizen.

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This was actually one of the reasons I became interested in lifestyle design. Jaded and admittedly bored by the routine of a normal life, I thought to myself, how best could I design a life that does not rely on some weird adult high school copycatting popularity contest that drives how so many people actually live their life? Could the focus truly be on how a specific individual wants to live his or her life, and then the uncertain details get filled in as the journey unfolds, instead of vice versa?

Okay, so we need a place to rest our heads. We need dinner on the table tonight as well as a general idea of how we will have dinner on the table at some point down the road. We need our health. We need love. We need to be working towards some greater purpose.

But otherwise, how might a script be tailored to fulfill my, our, or your very personal desires instead of using the vanilla framework designed 300 years ago or the roadmap provided by The Joneses and photocopied by everyone else? For me, it came solely down to freedom and self-expression, with the sub-categories being nature, sports, style, and writing.

There’s a truth about the ocean or a beautiful mountain. There’s a truth about a purely struck golf shot or a 103-mph fastball. There’s a truth about a finely woven Panama hat or a beautiful watch. There’s a truth about telling it exactly like it is. There’s a truth to saying no to conformity and yes to authenticity.

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Self care is so important. It’s actually the guiding light in my version of lifestyle design. It involves a combination of pursuing those beautiful things you personally love, taking care of yourself so you can best help others, and avoiding or limiting your interactions (which, cough cough, you control) with worry-inducing nonsense.

For me, self care and lifestyle design are essentially one in the same. In Mississippi, I focus on nature, sports, style, and writing daily. I’m always outside. I may ride the jet ski. I play golf every day. I have fun with my clothes. I jot down thoughts and notes hourly. I take pictures and make videos. It’s how I remain engaged with life. anything but khakis IS self care. anything but khakis IS lifestyle design.

Contrastingly, I only allot 5-10 minutes per day to news, regardless of the medium. I just need to know the general temperature, not how someone else wants me to feel or that two prominent adults called each other poopyheads (shout out high school). How anyone entertains any of this in 2020 seriously blows my mind.

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If I need medical advice, I ask a doctor, not my TV. If I want golf advice, I ask an exceptional golfer, not the peanut gallery. If I want to play the piano well, I call my mom, not the plumber.

And if, one day, you want true lifestyle design advice, something I’ve lived daily for 3.5 years and am super passionate about, I hope you will call me. I’m already helping a few people with less conformity, less reliance, more authenticity, more freedom, new hope, new possibility, and less boxes. I’d be happy to help you.

That’s not to say that I have your answers. No, of course not. Those don’t come from me or Facebook or anywhere else. Those have to come from within.

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Have a great week.-Benj

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