An abk Conversation

“John” (not an abk fan): This guy, Benj, has lost his mind.

“Bob” (friend of abk): I think he’s actually on to something, to be honest.

I mean, does he just do whatever he wants?

Not exactly, but what is wrong with that mindset? Shouldn’t everyone strive for that?

Never really thought about it. I was told: college, graduate school, good job, 40 years of work, 401k, retirement, travel a little, be bored a little, die. Any deviation from that is weird.

Anyone ever teach you about passion and happiness?

Don’t be ridiculous. Happiness is a big 401k and a big house. Right? Right? Right? Happiness is not rocking the boat. Right? Right? Right?

Happiness is happiness, pal.

What is this guy, Benj’s, superpower?

Interestingly, he has a TON of shortcomings that he finally learned to own. He’s kind of incompetent with a lot of normal things. Guaranteed he can’t change a tire. Guaranteed he struggles to cook dinner. Guaranteed you are a better husband and a nicer person than he is. The Mississippi folks make fun of his incompetence any chance they get.

But he does have two things. First, ACTION. He doesn’t play around with decades of thinking and pondering. He just processes information and, right or wrong, BAM! Second, MINDSET. He thinks completely differently from you. What’s scary to you is normal to him now, and what’s normal to you is scary to him. In fact, normal is scary to him.

He’s playing golf every single day at 37. Who does he think he is?

He’s trying to get really freaking good, and listen, I wouldn’t bet against him. He honestly believes he can do it. He’s not out there pounding beers all day.

He’s got some personal physical goals that he can’t wait on. I’m sure you’ve heard he’s got arthritis, which influences almost every decision he makes. For him, it might be impossible to do vigorous physical activity and/or travel the world comfortably at traditional retirement age. So, he’s doing it now.

That actually makes sense.

I’ve known him for a while. He’s a lot of things, but he’s not a dope.

He does have some lofty goals though. Scratch golfer? All 50 states? As many countries as possible?

He honestly believes, “Go big or go home.” One life.

Speaking of travel, he has traveled a couple hundred thousand miles over the past couple years. Does he ever see his family?

He’s a massive believer in quality time over just sitting there, everyone on their iPads. He actually has more quality time with ALL of his family (from NC to MS and everywhere in between) now more than ever. He also gains “family” on most every single trip. That’s a MAJOR goal of his.

Does he ever compromise?

Would you be willing to move to Mississippi?

Good point. What do you think he’s going to do next?

He’s got a list, and he’s leaning hard towards one thing specifically. It’ll take you off guard. But he swore me to secrecy.

Nothing takes me off guard with him any more.

He believes every day should be interesting and meaningful.

Sometimes I think he’s showing off.

No, he’s just showing. He believes too many people are talking and telling instead of doing and showing. He has lots of respect for doers.

Back to that ACTION thing, right?


You seem to know him well. What’s he trying to accomplish here?

He doesn’t have many soft spots, but he has a real soft spot for people and their self-esteem, happiness, and fulfillment. There have been stages in his life where he was unhappy, unfulfilled, in pain, and even lonely. He said “no more” to those feelings, and he sprung to action. He wants to show people that anything is possible, even if you have to rewire yourself like he did at age 35.

Anything is possible?

Yeah, you know he ran the NYC Marathon last year with very limited training?

Yeah, well, that was stupid.

Finally, we agree on something. That WAS incredibly stupid, and I guarantee you he now would agree. Occasionally, his zest for life gets the best of him. He knows that, but that’s just who he is.

There is an old saying in the banking world, “If you’ve never had a loan go bad, you haven’t done enough loans.” That’s how he feels about living.

Have a great week.-“Bob” 😉

Follow along on Instagram @anythingbutkhakis and @abkgolf.

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2 thoughts on “An abk Conversation

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