2019: Rocking the Boat, Rewriting the Rules, and The Ultimate Tradeoff

“When you have a goal like this, it has to be an obsession. For better or worse, everything else takes a back seat. You are basically trying to win the lottery.” – Comedian Nate Bargatze

What changed in 2019? Everything.

In 2019, I slept in my own bed for only 36 nights. I had 4 major injuries (foot, hip, lower back, upper back). I explored 22 states and Mexico. I golfed in 12 states and Mexico. I travelled roughly 30,000 miles. I played or practiced golf 194 days. In 8.5 months, I shaved 12.7 strokes off of my average score (94 to 81.3) and 8.7 strokes off of my handicap (14 to 5.3). My best score was 74 (last Thursday), and I shoot in the 70s regularly now. I had only 2 haircuts. After March 22, I got dressed up twice.

I currently own neither khakis nor jeans nor lots of other things that are simply not necessary at this time in my journey.

My love for style has not dwindled one bit. I’ve just replaced pinstripe suits with floral hoodies and golf clothes.

Plantar fasciitis is a big, bad bitch.

Watching the savings account go backwards instead of forwards is not for the faint of heart.

There’s good debt. There’s bad debt. And there’s no debt. The latter is freedom.

“You definitely want a little spice in your life. But too much can be unpalatable.”- Golfer Phil Mickelson

Travel thoughts right now? Definitely=Dallas and Natchez. Maybe=Mexico. Wish list=Detroit.

Cost of living difference from uptown Charlotte to Mississippi? Extreme.

I carry cash now. Casino town.

“Rare to find an educated, qualified professional who works only when he needs money, then quits his job when it’s time to be moving along, chasing tournaments like they’re roaming buffalo.”-Author Tom Coyne

Someone may look happy but actually be miserable. Someone may have a lot of friends but actually be lonely. Someone may appear to have it together but actually be broken. Been there. Done that.

Look to your left. Look to your right. You have no idea.

Something that is super simple or easy for you may be very difficult for me, and vice versa.

I absolutely love being a father, but I’ve really had to work at it.

“…what she considered success I considered failure.”-DJ Harvey

What are you interested in? Are you pursuing it? If not, why?

From a traditional financial standpoint, I took 9 months off. From every other standpoint, I was ON IT every single day. I made a massive investment in myself and the trajectory of my (and others’) future.

Early on, almost every day, I doubted or questioned myself. What am I doing? Being intentional felt selfish. Being so different felt weird.

“Pressure is a privilege.” -Billie Jean King

I voluntarily moved to a place where so many people believe the complete opposite of what I do.

I hope Christy and Banks are happy. That is a massive part of this.

You don’t have to pretend in New Orleans.

I love stuff that tastes good and looks good. Those are my vices.

Mountain Dew is my Jack Daniels. BBQ is my drug of choice.

I eat 20% of my meals at gas stations now.

“The journey doesn’t really start until things go sideways.”-Patrick Koenig, Joe Garvey

Coaching four year old soccer will teach you to let go. Otherwise, you might have a heart attack.

abk has no financial goal. Only impact.

Over 11,000 different people have read along at anythingbutkhakis.com at some point. Some read once and never return. Some read periodically. Some read every week.

I’m finally finding my community. It spans all over the country. Fits me perfectly.

I’m not the same person on days I don’t get to play golf.

I shot 75 last Friday and was not happy at all. I think this says something about me.

Actions dictate results. Attitude dictates luck.

Stuff is overrated and mostly unnecessary.

I feel like I’ve lived three full lifetimes over the past few years. I know how lucky I am.

I walked into Tijuana and played golf. That was crazy.

Every day is an opportunity to shoot the best score of my life. I’ve done it twice in December.

Sunshine is the best medicine.

Southern Mississippi at sunset is absolutely stunning.

You and I have a lot to be thankful for. Just trust me. I’ve seen some things.

My biggest struggle? I am wildly independent, but I’m working on it.

There are a zillion different worlds out there. Go find the one you want to live in.

The biggest travel surprise of the year was either southwestern Oklahoma; Eureka Springs, Arkansas; or Bryant, Alabama.

I have a hard time listening to people who have no frame of reference for what I am trying to do. It’s so much bigger than golf, likes, and follows. It’s impact. It’s lives. It’s happiness.

At the end of the day, I’m going to do it the abk way.

Vision can get ruined by focusing too much on taking out the trash.

Having said that, the trash still has to be taken out.

“Everything you can imagine is real.” -Pablo Picasso

I’ve become a Pelicans fan, but I’m definitely not a Saints fan. Drew Brees is class, though.

What scares me? Wanting independence and getting loneliness. Also, completely losing my health.

Health insurance costs are insane.

I would rather make the wrong decision than no decision at all. A million times over.

No excuses. Just own it.

“It’s my secret love to read the blog every week…I just won’t admit it in public of course.” -Anonymous friend via text

What’s most important to me? Action. Patience. Mindset. Attitude. Self-awareness. Freedom. Acceptance.

I like seeing alligators every day, but I also love wearing alligator belts. I struggle with that.

It is incredibly hard to build something from scratch.

We are all on a journey. I wasn’t put on earth to be a banker, though maybe I was for that period of time.

I’m 951 days into my conscious journey of living. I’m just a baby.

Biggest win of my journey so far? Becoming human.

The answer is still always yourself. But a helping hand never hurts.

These pictures from Torrey Pines in California, Tijuana Country Club, and Sand Hollow in Utah are my favorite golf images of the year.

A massive thank you to my family, friends, various landlords (lol), biggest supporters, golf buddies, travel mates, doctors, rehab team, and golf crew at Shell Landing.

2020 resolutions? Keep living. Inspire others to do the same.

I’ll be back in a few weeks. Enjoy your holidays.-Benj

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